Saturday, November 23, 2024
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Gratitude for Simply Being

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Meditation

We’re going to start tonight by simply checking in with what’s it prefer to be you immediately. So, just ask yourself the query, what’s it prefer to be me immediately? Then, simply look. How’s your body feel? What’s it prefer to be that body immediately? How’s your emotional world doing? Feel into that. How’s your mental life doing? Feel into that, and, to whatever extent it’s present for you, how’s your life doing immediately? We’re, in a really direct way, just tuning into our current experience, seeing it clearly, after which letting go of any need to alter it. Letting go of aggression towards it and the concept we need to make it different or higher or something.  As an alternative, just simply letting or not it’s what it’s. Let’s just tune into that for some time together, just noticing the way you’re doing, and letting that be just positive.

Good. Now, without changing anything in any respect, or doing anything, just tune into the already there wakefulness that’s present. The straightforward awareness that’s there, whether you do anything or not. Just tune into that, setting aside, in the intervening time, engaging from the machinery of the mind, and as a substitute, just noticing directly the straightforward awareness that’s all the time present. Should you’re wondering, “Well, how do I try this?” Well, that’s asking, how do anything is occurring? Nonetheless anything’s happening, that’s easy awareness itself. There it’s. It’s that straightforward. There’s nothing to do to make it aware. It’s already aware. You may’t make it more aware. It’s already all the way in which aware, but there are some things we are able to notice about it. 

Again, without really doing very much or changing it in any way, to start with we are able to notice that it’s very spacious. If awareness is currently really engaged with the machinery of the mind, it is going to are inclined to be slightly non-spacious. Once we set that aside, allowing the thoughts and planning and evaluation to maintain going in the event that they want, but we’re not likely involved in it or engaged with it. Once we set that aside, we notice that the wakefulness itself, the attention itself, is already very broad, very wide open. You may hear sounds from behind you and in front of you and above you and below. You may hear sounds in all directions. It’s already wide open. Light is noticed from all directions, feelings are coming from all directions. It’s broad, it’s wide open–we don’t should make it wide open. Just notice that it’s already there, already spacious, and sort of panoramic. You may’t really “do” spacious and panoramic. Should you try to return from the machinery of the mind and make it occur–I’m gonna open it this manner and spread it that way–that’s still much smaller and tighter than if we just step back and just let it do its thing, which is of course wide open. There is usually a real urge sometimes to attempt to open it up. As an alternative, just step back. It’s already wide open without doing anything in any respect. Rest on this wakeful wide openness.

One other really interesting quality of this wakefulness is that it has a whole lot of energy. It’s wide awake. It’s very energized. A technique we are able to play with that slightly bit that’s interesting is simply to breathe that energy directly into your lower belly. You don’t change your breath in any respect, really, but with each in-breath, you only feel the energy gathering in your lower belly. If you ought to, you’ll be able to see it coming directly in.   There’s a hole in your belly and it comes straight in, or you’ll be able to breathe it down if you happen to want. With each in-breath feel that energy gathering within the lower belly and just feel how that’s obviously energizing to the system, to the body and mind. In a way, paradoxically, it’s also very grounding. Let’s just breathe into our lower belly for some time here from this very spacious place. We’re not likely concentrating. We’ve got this already existing very spacious, wide awakeness, and we’re just calmly noticing that we are able to allow this energy to collect in our lower belly, below your belly button.

On the out-breath, you’ll be able to feel it. It is a feeling that radiates out from that spot sort of magnetically, so to talk–a sense of grounding and likewise energizing. Again, without trying to control it, or control it, or move it around, you may feel the energy radiating out from that lower belly into your extremities, into the remaining of the body, into the top, and so forth. This tends to make the body more relaxed and in that rest, in that real nice letting go, we discover a whole lot of stillness.  

Perhaps you’re having a very different experience than what I’m describing–and that’s okay. I’m just pointing to some things that you just might notice. 

Now, let’s move up, doing the identical strategy of respiratory right into a spot, but now we’re respiratory into our heart. From this very grounded place of the lower belly and maintaining a sort of strong footing in wide openness, just breathe into the center on the in-breath. Feeling the center opening up, energizing and unfolding, a flower opening up. On the out-breath it radiates out warmth; it radiates out a way of being balanced; it radiates out kindness; it radiates out connection. We’re respiratory out and in of the center, and really noticing how that feels within the body, the way it feels energetically.

Sometimes that place can feel slightly blocked or shut down, but that’s okay. Just let or not it’s the way in which it’s, and see that as we breathe out and in of the center center, it tends to warm up. It tends to melt like butter, tends to naturally open slightly bit, without us forcing anything or imagining it must be different. It just sort of relaxes open, at the very least slightly bit. Notice how, as the center warms and softens and opens, how that feels in the remaining of the body because it radiates outward, as those sensations radiate outwards.

Good. Now let’s move as much as the third eye, the brow. Respiration in there directly through a hole in the middle of your brow. Respiration in and respiratory out. Allowing the eyes to actually loosen up, the face to actually loosen up. Getting some sense of this clear vibrant wisdom energy constructing within the third eye center on the in-breath after which radiating outward on the out-breath. An actual sense of clarity and lucid perception of seeing things as they really are. As we breathe directly into this brow center, energized with this wisdom and clarity, the machinery of thought just falls apart, and we just notice vibrant clear wide open awakeness within the mind. Then radiating out into the body.

Good. Notice, as we breathe into this space, and feel into that space, contained in the breath, contained in the energy within the brow is just extra space. It’s just wide open in there. We will feel that there’s just tremendous boundless openness right in the top. It’s almost as if there’s no head. If we let go of imagining our head–let go of imagining the structure, and as a substitute just feel. What we feel is wide open spaciousness contained in the energy. It’s very hard for any particular thoughts to grab ahold inside that tremendously wide open energized space. It’s just so relaxed and so open, and so free. It’s not likely motivated in any respect to grab on to any thought, which collapses it down.

Just constantly letting go into wide openness, after which respiratory this wide openness straight down into the center, which is already warm and open. Now we notice in the middle of that energized warm, kind, heart, is boundless space. Every part else is a mental picture of the center.  If we let go of, or don’t engage with, that mental picture, what we feel is wide openness, tremendous freedom and spaciousness in the center. There are body sensations there but they’re not confining. Notice that the vast openness in the top is connecting directly with an unlimited openness in the center. In a way it’s almost like a tube or cylinder of vast space connecting the 2.

Good. Now we drop down, with this wide open, vast spaciousness, into the lower belly, noticing that, in that basically energized, grounded spot, there’s just wide openness–the sky–and that that’s connected to the sky-like quality of the center and the sky-like quality of the mind or the top. Feeling how awake and clear and vibrant that’s, and at the identical time, it’s simply wide open, very free, grounded, and relaxed. 

We will breathe in directly through the highest of the top, down through the brow center, through the center center, into the belly center. It’s only one massive open space. Then breathe back out, up that wide open channel. Despite the fact that we are able to still feel the body sensations, it’s as if your entire body is just completely transparent or utterly boundless, utterly without boundary–only a flow of energy in space.

Anywhere anything’s sticking, just let the space and energy open that up, with none effort. It’s absolutely effortless. It does it itself. Anywhere there’s any constriction, or crimping, or crunching, or tightening in any respect, just let the energy in space just release it. Anytime the mind hooks onto anything, just let the spaciousness just dissolve the hooks, with none effort, with none doing in your part in any respect. It just comes back into relaxed openness, wide awakeness, easy natural clarity and ease.

Good. Now, if there’s any remaining sense that you just’re making a visualization or attempting to imagine something if any of that’s happening just drop all that. Any remnant of that sort of imagination, just utterly drop it, and see that the spaciousness and the benefit and the clarity continues to be there. It’s all the time been there. We’re just letting it shine forth of its own accord, without distracting. Utterly letting go of doing anything in any respect. Just rest as open presence. There’s no option to “do” open presence. Should you’re attempting to make it occur, that’s a dead end. You have got to only let go of trying. What’s left is open presence, clarity, ease and spaciousness, with none doing in any respect. 

If the mind contracts right into a stream of thought or a fantasy, just notice that inside that’s tremendous spaciousness. It’s already awake, it’s already vibrant and clear and spacious, inside even that. Being caught up in a distraction is a sort of doing, and all we really want to do is let go of that doing. Just come back to rest, and we’re now not distracted. We’re back in clarity and presence and ease. All of the attempts of the machinery of the mind just take us away from this. There’s no option to do that. You have got to only not do. 

Sometimes people make a giant doing out of not doing. That is just not doing. Very simply, what happens is that the spaciousness is present, the benefit is there, the clarity, the stillness, openness. It’s just all right there the minute we’re not distracting away from it with a bunch of doing. The surefire sign that you just’re distracted or caught up in something is that you just’ll feel the space contract. As soon because the space contracts, just loosen up, just let go, just stop doing, and the naturally, all the time existing openness of the space will reveal itself.

Should you sit like this for some time, you notice something really odd. You may notice something really extraordinary, and that’s that as a substitute of feeling that you just’re sitting there doing a meditation, it is going to feel so much more like vast space and clarity and ease is manifesting a mind and a body. You may feel the body, and there are thoughts, and the mind, and there are feelings, and all that, but they’re sort of an expression of this open, clear, wide awake space. They’re almost appearing in it, made from it. In order that, as a substitute of being an individual doing a meditation and tuning into some sort of awareness, awareness is vibrating into being a body and a mind that just does stuff. This body and mind that appears inside and out of awareness is a joyous expression of openness. It’s an exquisite and noble manifestation from the very fountain of utter creativity, being recreated over and another time, moment by moment, into pure presence, pure beauty.

Moreover, you could notice that this expression of space as body and mind doesn’t stop there. It radiates outward. This joyous expression of beauty and profundity radiates outward touching all other expressions, and all those other expressions radiate back to you. So at the same time as this wakefulness, this wide open clarity and presence, bubbles forth right into a body and a mind and an individual, that bubbling forth can look back at its own source and just say thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks.

Okay, superb. Let’s let go of the formal meditation there, although, in fact, the meditation can keep going, for the reason that wakeful space is all the time present. 

Let’s just hop right in with any comments, reports, questions, things that you just don’t understand that you ought to direct at me, or things you ought to say happened.

Questioner 1: I’m just curious if you happen to could speak to when your mind is especially chatty, but you’re not likely clinging to the thoughts. Sometimes I’ll go down the rabbit hole, which is the more normal experience. But sometimes my mind is talking talking talking and it’s just bouncing, and I’m not likely holding on to the thoughts. Could you speak to that?

Michael: It’s an interesting thing. One of the crucial common misconceptions is that we must stop pondering, or that if meditation is working, your thoughts must stop. Some meditations try this, but in this manner of working we’re not. Remember, the very very first thing I said is we’re letting go of the aggression towards the self. Which means we feel we’ve got to alter what’s happening. We’re letting go of that: we don’t should make the mind do that, or the mind try this. Some meditations are doing that, but in this manner, if it desires to talk, it may talk talk talk talk talk talk, but we’re just not likely listening to it. It’s like, okay, you go over there and talk, we’re going to rest as awake presence. 

The talk doesn’t get in the way in which so long as you’re not grabbing onto it, attached to it, sure up in it. So sometimes I call that pondering thing the machinery of the mind. You may just set that down and it may sit there and still do its thing. It’s not getting in the way in which of anything. It only gets in the way in which if you happen to can’t let go. Should you keep grabbing onto every thought, you then’re doing the old tennis shoe-in-the-dryer thing. 

All of the spaciousness visualization helps to let that go, and again, letting go, meaning, literally, just let it run if it desires to run. We don’t should stop it, we don’t have to regulate it, we don’t should make it this or that thought. We just let it do its thing. It’s a really hands-off sort of approach. We’re not getting in there and manipulating and controlling.  

Suzuki Roshi of the San Francisco Zen Center used to say, if you happen to’re a farmer with cows, and also you fence within the cows, the cows will break down the fence or hop over it. The actual option to contain them is to present them a field so large they will never find the sting of it. That’s the concept. Working that way, what you begin to note, is that to actually be involved in pondering is an activity. You have got to grab on, and that could be a sort of tension. Should you learn to acknowledge that moment of cramping, it’s very easy to only not cramp. It’s an actual physical flavor–you’ll be able to feel it.  It may not be physical, but it surely’s a sense, so if you happen to learn to acknowledge, “oh, I’m grabbing right there”, you only don’t. 

Loosen up, after which the thoughts will run, or not, but you’re free, you’re just wide open. We now have a mental model that we’re on the mercy of our thoughts they usually sort of “have us,” but really, you don’t should grab on. They could be looping, but you don’t should hang on and go for the ride. It’s an actual open way of working.

Questioner 1: Great, thanks.

Michael:  Yep.

Questioner 2: Hi. I desired to ask about posture.

Michael: Sure, sit up.

Questioner 2: Okay, back pain will come and go, so should I just proceed trying to perk up and strengthen my spine?

Michael: It’s a tough one, because possibly your core could be weak, so it’s only a matter of getting used to having those muscles engaged. But, also we are able to do a thing;  If I say sit up–everybody sit up–and just concentrate when you try this. You may notice that you just get really tense in a certain way while you try this. Is it possible to search out a spot where you’re upright, but it surely’s not tense? Sometimes we try this as an exercise.  You sit up and sort of move around, not in an exercise way, but in an exploration way, where it’s balanced, where is it upright, but there’s almost no muscle tension. Perhaps you’ve got some sort of structural tension happening, but as you play with that increasingly over time, it starts to release those structural tensions, and also you’ll find you can just sit upright for a very very long time, because there’s almost no effort involved. You’ve got a very good balanced spot. 

Once we’re sitting really really still, it’s got to be essentially the most relaxed stillness–it’s never tight stillness.  It’s just really relaxed. Once you find real ease and spaciousness, the body just becomes very very soft, and really open, and really still, and it feels good to be upright, since the breath is so open, it’s so awake. So we’re finding this place that’s super relaxed and yet really awake and upright. Should you’re attempting to be sort of military upright–fallacious direction. It’s a really relaxed and balanced upright. It’s tensegrity or something.

Questioner 2: Okay, thanks.

Questioner 3: I actually have this sort of mental process where a few of my experience, possibly it’s tension…

Michael: Don’t fight the strain, then that’s double tension. I find some tension here and I got to attack it make it go away and so I’m gonna make those fingers loosen up–that’s exactly not what we’re doing, right? That’s aggression:  “I’m going to alter it,” and it’s an actual habit in our culture. We’re going to take that forest and make it a mall, whether it likes it or not. We’re not doing that, it’s more, okay there’s some tension there, can I find the spaciousness and ease inside it, even when it’s still tense? There’s already spaciousness and ease inside it, so we just sort of find that, and loosen up around it, loosen up towards it, and also you’ll notice it starts to get softened already, just by removing our aggression towards it. Little by little, we’re just allowing, allowing, allowing, and if I’m allowing, this can begin to open, but it surely also might take some time. Simply to be really clear, while I’m sitting I’m not attempting to force anything.

Questioner 3: I feel I actually have a process that goes around searching for tenseness after which I’m “oh, that process sort of is a tension.” 

Michael: It’s its own doing doing doing doing; so just let go.

Questioner 3: … after which I’ll be lost in thought.

Michael:  That’s a tension, too, right? So it takes a whole lot of tension to be lost in thought. You’ll notice, if you happen to loosen up that exact tension, your mind goes open and really present. Then it’ll snap shut again, then just loosen up again, and over time the sort of habit of tension within the mind will just begin to ease. It won’t be such a robust habit, after which ease some more. So at first after I say “your mind is just naturally open,” most individuals are, “no, it’s just sitting there, closed.” But did you ever see someone who’s been sitting in a chair just about all day long for a whole lot of years? They’ve a tough time. Their body’s real stiff. Our mind might be sort of stiff if it’s used to being tight, but you’ll notice even inside that, there’s spaciousness and ease, even inside that tension. We keep coming back to that and even that sort of habitual tightness will soften. Especially with the sort of respiratory into it and stuff that we’re doing. That actually allows it to get supple, removes the stock tension pretty quickly, okay?

Questioner 4: There was some extent in the course of the meditation once we were coming all the way down to the center, as we were taking place, I felt overwhelmed, but that feeling of being overwhelmed was within the mind, it wasn’t in the center, it wasn’t anxiety. 

Michael:  Right, and it wasn’t in your belly either, right?

Questioner 3:  Exactly, not in my belly. It was in my mind, but there was no association with the actual thought, and that made me need to disconnect almost because I felt as if it’s just too overwhelming, I just have to take a step back. Is that common in meditation? That is my first guided meditation.

Michael:  Sure, sure, that might be pretty common although you’ve gotten an unusual level of clarity about it, in order that’s good. You should utilize the belly and the center as a resource because they’re not overwhelmed. So as a substitute of “Oh, I’ve got to depart the meditation, I’ve got to get out of this,” you only keep feeling that groundedness and kindness and ease within the belly and the center, and the sensation of overwhelm will soften and ease and go away. Essentially it’ll calm down. 

A variety of times the mind shouldn’t be used to being caught up in thought, and it’s “whoa, where’s the bottom, because I’m used to being tight contained in the machinery, and if I if I’m not in my cage, where am I?” So it’s the overwhelm of freedom–you get used to it, after which it won’t freak you out anymore, okay?

Questioner 3: Thanks.

Questioner 4: I noticed with the actual wordage of letting it go or releasing it, I noticed my mind’s habitual tendency to see that as rejecting it or avoiding it. For instance, with the posture, I notice each time that I come and sit on this particular type of mat, I’d have chosen the chair but I didn’t really have a alternative.

Michael:  You may all the time ask for an additional chair, we’ve got plenty of them, so be happy, okay?

Questioner 4:  Good. I’ll try this next time, because I noticed that a whole lot of pain arose in my body and what was rising was this a part of me that was feeling revolt of, “how dare you inflict pain on me within the name of freedom, or something.” I’m inquisitive about your thoughts on that.

Michael:  There’s so much to say about that, but I’d say, next time, sit in a chair and don’t just sit in pain. If it’s essential to move, move. Don’t just sit there letting that be inflicted upon you. Much more deeply, outside the meditation, there’s loads of pain that’s going to be inflicted on you by life, right? Cancer pain, and stuff you can’t do anything about that’s inflicted upon you. So is your response to that just going to be, “how dare you?”? It could be for some time, right? Perhaps for a very long time, and that’s a very good response. 

But, eventually, it’s still happening; pain of being old, pain of inauspicious stuff happening in life, pain of friends dying, pain of relationships falling apart, pain of kids moving away, pain of all of the stuff that happens. All of it gets inflicted upon us, and that’s not some sort of mistake of some kind. It’s tragic, but in one other way of enthusiastic about it, it’s just life. So we’ve got to learn to take a seat with that, too. That’s why sometimes on purpose we do–we didn’t tonight–but sometimes we actually work with the pain that comes up in meditation, either emotionally or physically, for that very reason: because within the deep end of the pool, that’s the stuff that meditation is de facto teaching us to work with; because rebelling against it doesn’t get you anywhere. It just wears you out. The stuff that may’t be modified. Posture we are able to change, but there’s stuff we are able to’t change, and that’s why this isn’t just “let’s all drift away on a cloud of nice fantasy,” we’re really learning to work with the pain that life brings. 

In order that query is significant, and it’s what our practice teaches you. Should you can find spaciousness even in pain which is certainly there, you begin to grasp work with this. So again, all the time, if you have to move to not be in pain, try this, but sometimes there could be other smaller pains that aren’t quite so overwhelming, that you just decide to work with and start to note that they, too, are spacious and free and present. This goes in an interesting direction, a very powerful direction. So it’s a fundamental query.

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