Nondual Meditation with Michael Taft
Meditation
Wow, got a variety of people here tonight. That’s great. So let’s begin just by checking in, not meditating, not doing anything special, just tuning in to the way it feels to be you right away, the thoughts which can be present, the emotions which can be present, body sensations which can be present and easily allowing what’s ever there to be there. So we’re really comprehensively just noticing what it’s prefer to be ourselves right away and accepting that entirely. Whatever it seems like is positive, regardless of how awful or let’s say explodingly too energetic, or something, whatever it’s, it’s all positive. But just notice it. Be with what’s actually happening.
And now, I would like you to seek out that the majority brokenhearted place inside yourself, the saddest spot, and just feel that only for a moment, the really sad place, and just let that be present without trying to alter it or control it or deny it. Notice that that’s there and that’s okay, and just let which have its room, have its place.
Now, I’d such as you to start doing a little deeper respiration, I’m gonna do some belly respiration or whatever deep respiration works for you but the concept is solely that you simply do
a big in-breath after which a very long exhale. So the exhale is for much longer than the inhale. That’s the necessary part but it surely helps if it’s a pleasant belly inhale to start with. Make it give you the results you want, don’t struggle, don’t make the out breath so long that it’s difficult or uncomfortable, but we would like to have a pleasant deep in-breath after which a very, really long out-breath. And so let’s be with just that for some time together.
If you should, if it lets you stay focused, ensure, in fact, that you simply’re feeling the body sensations of that in-breath very clearly and feeling the body sensations of that out-breath very clearly. How’s that feel in your belly? How does that feel in your rib cage? How does that feel in your perineum? How’s that feel in every single place? And noticing all of the sensations in-breath and out-breath. And if you should you may label respiration in, ‘respiration in,’ for the in-breath, and respiration out, ‘respiration out,’ for the out-breath. So let’s just be with that together for some time here.
Feel how good it feels to breathe. Body really likes to breathe. It would help when you feel the start of every in-breath. Ensure you notice that moment of the start of the in-breath and ensure you notice the moment of the top of the out-breath. They’re right next to one another but they’re different. Just sink much more deeply into that breath.
It would feel lovely. It would actually feel sort of painful. It would feel a variety of alternative ways but just let it feel that way. Nevertheless the breath feels is the best way for it to feel right away. Really sink into that.
Good, now notice what’s noticing the breath, notice the noticing, notice this–the attention that’s present. and just notice that that awareness that’s present that’s aware of the respiration could be very open, it’s very spacious, it’s boundaryless, it’s wide, it’s free. And I would like you to mainly just rest being that awareness while allowing the breath sensation to easily arise and pass in the attention. So as an alternative of sort of specializing in the breath, or specializing in the body, we’re doing something different now, we’re simply resting as open awareness inside which the wave of the breath rises and falls and awareness notices that wave of the rising and falling breath with none effort, with none difficulty, it’s just already aware. So we’re still in a way meditating on the breath but within the lightest possible way, mainly like 98% just resting as awareness with the breath simply rising and falling in awareness. Let’s try this together now.
Should you like meditating along with your eyes open, that’s kind of the normal method to work it with this part, try to stay absolutely still, don’t move, don’t scratch, don’t shift, remain still. Notice that this spacious awareness is already aware. It requires no work to be awake. It’s already aware of the sensation of the breath. So we’re just resting in awakeness, feeling the breath, remaining uninvolved with pondering but not fighting the pondering, just being the open awareness noticing the breath. Awareness is awake. Not sleep. Should you’re having trouble staying awake, sit up, open your eyes. But, in fact, awareness is awake regardless of what. It’s just the mind that’s sleepy.
We’re resting outside the mind, simply awareness itself feeling the breath, resting in wakefulness, feeling the breath. In a method we are able to notice how spectacularly bizarre this feels, not a special state, not altered, simply resting as the attention that’s all the time present. It’s easy to enter an altered state, we do it on a regular basis but that sometimes serves as some sort of entertainment or distraction from this that’s here on a regular basis, but wow take a look at this thing that’s here on a regular basis. Let it see itself, awareness seeing awareness, awareness showing itself to itself. Notice that it has no boundary, it’s utterly vast, unconstrained, not cramped, open, free, as wide because the sky with none effort. Notice that now. Rest in that vastness effortlessly now.
If it seems like it’s closing in or becoming cramped or tightening down just chill out, notice it effortlessly comes back to openness, it’s all the time open. That is the natural state of awareness and look, look right away, not only is it boundless–how long has awareness been here? How long has it been aware? This endless awareness has been here since beginningless time. It has no starting, it’s unbounded in space and unbounded in time. Look in your personal experience, when did it start? When did awareness start? Not in your memory, not in ideas, not in thoughts, but right away. Look! When did awareness start?
It has all the time been aware. That is the natural state of awareness, boundless and timeless, but look much more closely, now, right away, look in your personal experience. Awareness has no damage, awareness has no trauma, awareness has no scars, it’s absolutely perfect and pristine at every moment. Our thoughts and emotions and bodies and spirits can have difficulty and damage and scars but awareness itself never does. Absolutely pristine, all the time perfect, all the time utterly healed in every moment, and utterly indestructible.
Look now. Notice your personal completely pristine, perfect, clear, undamaged, unsullied awareness. Remain perfectly still, still means still, on this natural state, totally unaltered, totally normal state of awareness. Notice the boundlessness, the timelessness, the perfection, the pristine quality of awareness. But look, right away, in your personal experience and see also the loving quality of this awareness which comes from its openness, rejects nothing, it accepts and welcomes every part (partially since it can’t be ever harmed in any way.) It’s utterly welcoming, utterly accepting, utterly loving. Notice that now.
Its wide open arms accept every thought, every emotion. All the pieces that comes into awareness is aware, is seen, is noticed. It’s deeply loving, that is the natural state of awareness utterly open, utterly loving and accepting, rejecting nothing, greeting every part. This awareness is utterly real and yet look, right away, in your personal experience. It’s not a thing. You can not make a thing out of it. It’s not an object in awareness. Noticing doesn’t make an object out of noticing, it’s noticing. It’s not a thing, this awareness which is utterly real and yet not a thing.
Notice now where it comes from. Where is that this awareness coming from? What’s the ground from which it springs? Look closely, you’ll notice there isn’t any ground. You may have ideas about where awareness arises from but those are only thoughts. Should you look rigorously in your personal experience, right away, you’ll see clearly it has no ground, it has no source, it’s not itself resting on anything, it’s groundless. Look now at this eternal, timeless, perfect, vast, loving, groundless awareness and see now that it’s what’s looking.
Superb. Now let’s let go of the meditation.
Dharma Talk, Q&A
Notice that we’re not breaking away from some special state, the attention remains to be there. The notice itself hasn’t modified. It’s utterly just the way in which it’s been and the thing that may get in the way in which with the way in which we’re working on this meditation is that if we begin to give it some thought, for instance, if I say something like, ‘awareness is boundless or awareness is vast,’ we are able to begin to just do really sort of two things, we are able to either give it some thought or we are able to start attempting to do something. So a variety of people try to make their awareness big by some means, like pushing or sort of expanding or whatever, similar to feeling like they’re looking in numerous directions and stuff like that. But that’s completely unnecessary. Awareness is already vast, it’s already wide and when you’re not noticing that, it’s simply because you’re being attentive right away in a narrow way, but when you chill out it just comes back to openness.
Or, if we’re fascinated with it, we are able to say something like, well, let’s see, your eyes are open, typically we might do a meditation like this with our eyes open, you don’t should but that’s sort of traditional, you realize, say something like, ‘it’s boundless,’ and also you’ll think, ‘but I see a room around me so it’s bounded by a room,’ or ‘there’s a floor.’ That’s an obvious boundary but we’re talking about experience here and so what’s really there may be a picture of a ceiling arising within the mind or a picture of a floor and that’s not a boundary in any respect. By way of my sitting here experience, right away, it’s just a few image arising, right? Same thing once I say, ‘it’s timeless,’ we are able to have ideas of, ‘oh, it began because my brain assembled in my mother’s womb,’ or whatever, cells got here together after which sooner or later there was a–then a miracle happens and there was you realize this these knock-on effects and by some means consciousness happened but that’s an idea, right? That’s a story, we’re telling ourselves about what happened. And I’m not commenting about whether that happened, or not. That’s not what we’re doing here.
Relatively, we’re looking in our experience, right away, about what–to place it in a funny way–how long does it feel prefer it’s been there? Or look like it’s been there? And when you look, it seems like it’s been there either ceaselessly or that the query is mindless. Those are sort of the 2 answers. They’re the identical answer, in a way, if you should call them a solution. It’s like a divide-by-zero error or something, it just doesn’t make sense to even ask that. It’s just either all the time been there or it’s timeless in your direct experience not ideas about it, not in attempting to discuss, you realize, the science of development or something, we’re just looking directly into experience, the identical thing with the indestructibility of it, or the undeniable fact that it can’t be hurt, it can’t be damaged, that’s just directly noticeable. And in fact, human beings can have a variety of hurt, a variety of wounding, a variety of scars, a variety of psychological issues, trauma, etc., but that is just not in the attention. In order that’s not touching the attention. The notice is noticing that. The notice itself is all the time pristine. It’s never hurt in any way.
Don’t imagine me, take a look at the attention itself and see that it’s boundless, notice that it’s timeless, notice that it can’t be hurt, it’s indestructible. It’s one in every of the–if we got into some traditional language, we might say, it’s one in every of its vajra qualities, it’s indestructible. That’s what vajra means, can’t be harmed. And same with loving, I’d say it’s loving.
Sometimes you get a variety of pushback; but isn’t it neutral? How can it have a high quality? An emotional quality? etc. But I’m not talking in regards to the emotional quality, although that’s related to it, I’m talking about its very openness, the undeniable fact that because it may possibly’t be hurt, it’s not attempting to push anything away. The undeniable fact that awareness just is aware of every part that arises. It doesn’t just filter out the stuff it doesn’t like and only permits the stuff it likes, it’s all the way in which open, all the way in which welcoming, all the way in which accepting, on a regular basis. The thoughts and feelings may not be. I’d really be having some thoughts and feelings about stuff but awareness itself? Wide open, completely accepting, no judgment, totally loving.
And just look, again, don’t imagine me, look in your personal experience, you’ll see it’s like that. Then the actually really weird stuff comes next just like the undeniable fact that it’s not a thing. As soon as I start talking about awareness, you are attempting to begin finding a thing called awareness, and we’re saying words about it, we’re attempting to point attention on the thing called awareness. But, in fact, it’s the thoughts are arising, it’s looking. You possibly can never make a thing out of it. Nothing is a thing but we are able to still make things out of them, right? Really they’re never a thing but we are able to try this with our mind. But you may’t make awareness right into a thing, it’s outside of that, it’s never, ever, ever an object. Objects, if there are any, they arise inside it and pass away from it. But, in fact, they’re all product of awareness too. So really nothing is a thing.
After which the very, very–possibly most difficult, most terrifying, most upsetting, but most deeply satisfying thing about awareness is; there’s no ground. There’s no place to seek out the source of it. You possibly can’t get to the top of it. You possibly can’t resolve it. It’s not going to will let you curl up and rest in your little cat bed, you realize, curled in a circle, snoring, your toe beans hanging out like you will have 15 legs. It doesn’t try this. It’s, in a way, all the time falling through space. It’s just utterly groundless. And that quantity of freedom is frightening, at first, to the pondering, feeling mind.
But eventually, that quantity of freedom becomes the final word refuge, right? The undeniable fact that it’s groundless, in that way, is what’s so wonderful about it. It’s not dependent.
When, you realize–if we talk in traditional languages about this quality, they often in English or western languages will use a word meaning enlightenment but that’s not the word, that’s not the best translation. The interpretation into English is freedom or liberation, and that’s the liberty we’re talking about, that groundlessness, absolute timeless not thingness of utterly pure, crisp, wide open, loving, accepting awareness.
Right? That’s freedom and whatever thoughts are arising, awareness is positive, whatever feelings are arising, awareness is positive. It’s not ignoring them since it’s aware, right? But neither is it accepting and rejecting them or, let’s imagine, they’re all accepted. It’s not grabbing onto or rejecting them. And again, don’t imagine me, it’s not like a belief system. Just look. I’m just mentioning what’s there so that you can notice about your personal awareness and as an alternative it’s–we’re not doing it through ideas, I even have to speak in ideas to sort of point to it but when you try to do that with ideas you’re in doing the fallacious thing, you’re like going about it incorrectly. It’s moderately, just take a look at the attention itself with the attention itself. It’s direct, okay?
In order that’s what we’re as much as and that’s the, you realize, freedom that’s available. Notice it’s not some sort of special state. We are able to do meditations and get in very altered states, that’s positive but altered states come and go. This doesn’t come and go.
So questions, comments, reports?
Questioner 1: So possibly an odd report, but I noticed that I used to be like regarding you
as like an offended figure who’s gonna hit me if I move. Is that like–I had a variety of anger towards you about it.
Michael: Awesome. So notice that awareness is positive with that, right? You’re projecting anger onto me, you’re feeling anger back. Obviously, I’m not offended at anyone for moving. We agreed to all stay still before we began but it surely’s not like I’m gonna come and hit you. At the identical time, we’re not in here to have some nice emotions and never other emotions, so if anger’s arising that’s interesting, okay? That’s what’s happening now. But in fact, I won’t ever hit you.
Questioner 1: I feel like I actually did need that in order that was helpful.
Michael: I’d just come over there and really yell at you. Perhaps I’m taking that back.
Thanks on your report. I believe it’s interesting to note that.
Questioner 2: That is my first time in your class. I’ve never tried this approach to meditation before, so while you told us simply to rest I used to be like, oh, what do I do? I don’t know what I’m doing. Perhaps I’m just bored.
Michael: So the reply is; just rest, don’t do anything, and when you’re bored then be bored. Okay? And there’s something that’s noticing the boredom, that’s what we’re really here for, okay? It’s not about, oh I have to be in a state of doing something, because we’re noticing the thing that wishes to do. It’s not that, oh I would like to have interaction my pondering in order that I don’t have this emotion of boredom. It’s; notice that boredom is arising in awareness, okay? Is that so bad? Be bored. But it surely’s; how do you realize you’re bored?
How do you realize you’re bored?
Questioner 2: I don’t know.
Michael: You don’t know. Should you realize it, okay. Well, discover, right? Discover whether you’re bored or not, and when you are, how do you realize? Right? Just look. Again, meditation is just not entertainment—so we’re not attempting to not be bored. The truth is, if we’re super bored, that is likely to be really, really interesting. Okay, we’ll just sit with that and see that urge that wishes to fill the mind with latest material, what’s that covering up? If we’re bored for greater than a number of minutes what might come up that we’ve been avoiding?
How do you realize anything? I’m asking you, how do you realize anything? Consider the word I’ve used about 600 times on this meditation, possibly 700, since you’re aware of it, right? The notice is central. So boredom is a state on the market that awareness is noticing, that’s interesting, okay? Whereas, if we tackle the ‘I’m the boredom’ that’s sort of a misapprehension.
What else? Yes.
Questioner 2: Hey Michael, in my meditation practice but in my life, as well, I’ve
come across a standard theme of asking myself an issue; when is motion appropriate and when is inaction appropriate? So for instance, in some meditation techniques, they have you ever developing an intense deal with the breath and in other meditation techniques, they feel more like this one, where it’s sort of similar to, settle into what’s all the time been there. What are resources I suppose you recommend on like not only in meditation but deciding, generally like, when it’s positive when every part is positive, there’s nothing to do, nowhere to go, etc., and when, you realize, to hop on the proverbial like hamster wheel, I suppose.
Michael: Let’s all be hamsters, together. Hamsters are cute. I like hamsters. I even have a pleasant wheel, nice protected wheel. Do you ever do any sports?
Questioner 2: Yes, Tae Kwon-do.
Michael: Okay, so you realize how in Tae Kwon-do you may do a roundhouse kick or you can do a sidekick, right? Which one must you do?
Questioner 2: It depends upon the context.
Michael: Yeah, or, you realize, which one do you should do? It’s not that one is true and the opposite one’s fallacious. They’re just various things you may do. So in every single place everyone seems to be claiming that they’ve the one right meditation technique that everybody should do and I’m like, you realize, that’s like saying my paintings all have the one true color I take advantage of this perfect orange and all the colours are banned from painting. Relatively, you realize, each technique or each even non-technique is acceptable for what it’s appropriate for, okay? And so possibly that’s a non-answer by way of which one to do but it surely’s approach it and begin to work with which of them appear to be intuitively in tune with you, that they feel more appropriate, they feel like, oh once I try this sort of meditation I feel just a little more at home, etc., etc., and that’s method to begin.
After which over time, you begin to get challenged with those that feel just a little less at home but are value doing, and so forth, and little by little you expand your palette from just this perfect orange. You get another colours in there and also you begin to give you the option to experiment. And so it’s on you, you realize? And it’s when teachers start telling you that they know what you must try this I’d look out. Okay? Relatively, it’s like hey, here’s access to tools, here’s some stuff you should utilize, here’s cool ways to make use of them, here’s the way in which I take advantage of them, and so forth, but still it’s your work with yourself. Thanks.
Questioner 3: Yes, so in my meditation today once I noticed awareness, I…
Michael: Who noticed it? Or what noticed it?
Questioner 3: I definitely felt prefer it was still me. There was still a way of separation but like an appreciation for it and it felt like heart opening and softening after which all these answers got here in. It was like a really fruitful awareness. After which I used to be experiencing a variety of physical discomfort and I attempted to simply concentrate on that physical discomfort.
Michael: That’s what we do.
Questioner 3: And I could do it but then I felt like I used to be free falling.
Yeah, it was just a little bit terrifying
Michael: Yeah! You’re doing it! That’s it! Remember I said it’s groundless, you’re falling, it’s terrifying, I used all of those words.
Questioner 3: yeah, it was terrifying after which after that, I began meditating with my eyes open, it was easier to handle by some means.
Michael: Yeah, normally that’s what I say, on this style, sometimes it’s easier to have our eyes open. But notice regardless of how much you free fell through space or felt scared nothing bad actually happened. You’re positive, right?
And so, that is just the fear of a chicken that’s been inside a tiny cage for like its whole life and it comes out of the cage and it’s like, Aaaaahhhh, there’s no cage! for only a minute, after which it’s like, Oh! Right? You’ve heard me before, I talked in regards to the animal videos on Youtube, where the–like for instance cows which have been stuck in a dairy barn their whole life are suddenly let loose, and so they’re all at first sort of, what’s that horrible blue thing up there? It’s so gigantic and at last, they’re like, Oh! They begin jumping around and, you realize, you ever see cows jump? Or gamboling, right? They’re just running around and that’s the move.
So at first, it’s scary and it may possibly feel like I said, it’s groundless. You’ll feel such as you’re falling since you’re used to imagining a ground but the attention is free! So what you’re feeling is free. And at first it’s just scary but notice nothing bad happens, so after just a little while, you’re not scared anymore, and also you start–the liberty a part of it becomes the really salient part, but in addition it’s loving, right? It’s really super protected. So yeah, so you probably did it! You’re getting there, right? You noticed it.
Questioner 3: Yeah, I mean being freed from that cage that’s totally helpful.
Michael: Yeah, right. So gambol while you get outside. Do some gamboling. Other reports or questions?
All right. Thanks for putting up with my totally irrational and super-intense need for you all to be still, and I hope to see you all next week once we could be still together again.
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